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divinesunshine7 Message
30 Jul 2016, 07:45 AM

Doctors Remember that you must become your own advocate. Research and know what nerves effect what regions of the body. If you have Tarlovs on the sacrum know what nerves could be affected. You may have to educate the doctors. If they dismiss you, let them go and don't try to prove anything. Find a new one. Remember that they are your consultant and if they don't offer insight then keep looking. If they are not open minded, you don't want them as your doctor. Chances are you will be their only Tarlov patient unless they are a neurosurgeon. Family and Friends They may not be capable of understanding you. They will notice you have changed, but remember before you had this issue you probably had no need to really understand either. Be patient with others and understand that it is like a new culture for you. Some friends will move on and others will still be nice, but won't make much effort . Some fear what they do not understand and this can be easier for them to deal with by ignoring the need for change. Remember that while you cannot go hiking with them or shop all day or even sit on the hard seats at a baseball field with no back or neck support that your spirit is still the same and you are still as precious. This journey just means you will need to adjust. They do not likely relate to constantly assessing your environment for the most comfortable seat. They may also not understand your new found frustration over having to repeat things because of a lack of endurance or even that your house is messy or you left something on the floor because you could not bend over one more time. You will be seen differently so know who you are and look for validation in yourself. Learn to make your complaints more generic. I don't feel well is sufficient and leave the details off if you can. Hearing those details make most people uncomfortable. Keep a diary where you can put those thoughts and feelings that others don't want to hear. Otherwise you could appear as a Debbie downer. Spend some time with pets. They help the brain release endorphines and help relieve stress. Taking care of someone else is good for you. Forgive others for moving on after all, your paths are different. Be patient with your significant other. You are different to them now in some cases like a whole new person. They have to learn to adjust too. Learn about their style of communication and be complementary to that. Reassure them with appreciation. Don't criticize for things like how they fold the laundry, etc. Don't try to control the environment as this is a sign you need some introspection. Focus on controlling how you react. If you cannot do your old hobbies then find new ones. You are responsible for your own happiness and joy. Know the difference. Happiness comes from how you react to external environment and is externally driven. Joy is self generated from your spirit. It creates an equilibrium and state of gratitude. If you want to talk, please do. Here is where you can share details freely.